a dad so great from a Father so loving

What I've thought of so often with Dad and Jeremiah.

How do I even begin to thank everyone who has prayed so faithfully and lovingly for my dad and our family??!  Not only that; there are a host of people who have encouraged us, been present for us, served us, and loved us unconditionally.  How do you thank a crowd that does all that for you?!  So I'll just say "thank you," because if I try to say more, it will still be redundant and inadequate.

Despite many prayers for healing, God saw fit to take my dad from us this morning.  What I feared so much in these past 2 years, happened this morning.  Although I knew it was coming, it still hurts so, so much.  I don't understand God's ways, but I know He is good.  If only it weren't so very hard to see the goodness.

Among the tears, there is laughter, because our family is together, remembering family jokes and old annoyances.  It's funny how something so frustrating in another person becomes so small and insignificant when the person is taken from you.

There will be no more bike rides, Sunday cloud gazing and ice cream, swimming, driving instructions, impromptu Costco stops, special, unexpected gifts, cross-country trips, and so many other things like we had before.  There were also all those times he went out of his way to take us to a special event, which meant nothing to him except to make us so happy.  How do I say enough about a dad who made life special and realistic, gave advice and listened, loved and served.  I won't forget crying on him in these hard times and hearing him quote the Bible, encouraging me always to keep pursuing God.  I only wish I had more opportunities yet to come for all of these moments to happen over again.

Jeremiah and Dad are having a great time enjoying the Father together today.   How impossible it seems to live out my life without both of them.  Why is it that you wait to express how much you love and appreciate someone until that person is gone?  I love you both so much, and, as I told Dad last night on the phone, I miss you so much and can't wait to be there.  

Be still, my soul--the Lord is on thy side!

Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;

Leave to thy God to order and provide--

In every change, He faithful will remain.

Be still, my soul--they best, thy heav'nly Friend

Thru thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul--thy God doth undertake

To guide the future as He has the past;

Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake--

All now mysterious shall be bright at last.

Be still, my soul--the waves and winds still know

His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Be still, my soul--the hour is hast'ning on

When we shall be forever with the Lord,

When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,

Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.

Be still, my soul--when change and tears are past,

All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.

This week Tirzah was scheduled to help at a school play in North River, Wednesday through Friday.  Tirzah and I were going to go together and get in some friend time, too.  With all that was going on with Dad this week, I didn't know that we should go, but we ended up going after all.  This is part of a texting conversation I had with my tremendous brother, Caleb, on our way down to North River on Wednesday.